Domino’s is the latest mass food retailer to misappropriate the word “artisan”, joining Frito-Lay (“artisan” tortilla chips) and Starbucks (“artisan” breakfast sandwiches) in a shameless attempt to sway customers.  So I present to you, in all its greasy glory, the “artisan” pizza from Domino’s.  A too-thick, chewy, oily crust topped by feta, mozzarella, onions, and spinach.  It tasted exactly like every other Domino’s pizza, with a slightly reduced load of toppings compared to the standard pile-on.

No, wait:  it was a tiny increment better than the usual, as it did not contain the chain’s recently reformulated but still way too sweet tomato sauce.  Still, it’s an insult to true pizza artisans all over the globe.

At least I didn’t have to pay for it:  thanks to chaos at the local Domino’s, it took forever and the manager comped it.  (Yet it wasn’t even worth THAT price.  I threw out the leftovers.)